I confess.

I have been lying.

Don’t know for how long;


The good news is,

I am no more lying to myself.

I am lying to her.


I confess.

I am lying to her,

False future promises?

May be!

I don’t know what the future might get.


If it does things in my favour,


May be!

It will anyhow break me.

But, oh!

I am not a six year old.

She remembers this,

I guess I have forgotten.

Pity on me.

I am not the same.

I am not ideal.

I have been lying,

Don’t know for how long.

Cooking and cleaning,

She knows I can’t.

But she doesn’t give up,

On me,

She teaches me.

But, oh!

I am not learning it.

I can’t.

I have been lying,

But not to myself;

To her.

I am guilty I know,

I couldn’t become what I ought to have;

What the daily soaps show.

Pity on me.

I am not the same.

I am not ideal.

I have been lying,

Don’t know for how long.


What courage need I?

If you fall first and call me,

If you announce, to the world

Of your underlying feelings,

Of your beating heart,

That calls my name.

What courage need I?

If no failure is foreseen,

In our alliance;
But let me clear one point,

I shall deny all love I mistake,

If I find no respect,

For me or for you,

In each others heart.
And so shall the love remain,

Void even of the title love.

How long?

How long can you handle ill treatment?

How long can you not rebel?

How long will tears fall back?

How long I know not,

Should I think of others.
Modernity tells me,

Speak your heart, follow your desire,

They too tell me the same.

But, still somewhere, they expect,

On tiny trivial matters,

For me to suppress, my loves,

My likes, if I can still breathe.
Oh yes, I can breathe without my dreams,

Without courage and freedom,

But I don’t know,

How long will then I breathe?

How long will the heart pump warm blood?

How long will the lifeless body, 

Hold on to the string of life?

How long will I smile,

If you put conditions on my freedom?